Down by the old mainstream

Thoughts from an evening wasted watching the Grammys...

It's been years since I've watched this awards show, but I'll give them credit for devoting the bulk of time to performances. More rock, less talk indeed.

How high was Whitney Houston? Moderately, I'm guessing.

Man, is that stage patter some lame stuff. That general store joke Justin Timberlake read was deemed worthy?

There were a fair number of brief audio dropouts during the telecast, especially during the performances. Is it possible that these aren't technical malfunctions but anti-piracy measures?

I'm assuming the switch to black-and-white during the hip hop summit was purposeful, but it sure didn't seem to have a reason. (I've since been informed it was established as a Rat Pack tribute, but they didn't even stick with b&w through it all.)

If a pregnant M.I.A.--due today, by the way--was going to perform, couldn't they have given her a little more time to strut her stuff? I'm a little surprised they didn't censor "get high" from "Paper Planes", although she never got to the parts (gun shot sound effects, weed references) that probably wouldn't have made the cut.

Katy Perry's fifteen minutes are due to be up any day now, and her thoroughly uncharismatic performance at the Grammys ought to hasten her departure. Yeah, yeah, your song is "controversial". Enjoy it while it lasts because this is exactly the sort of thing that will be mocked five to ten years from now in a "what was the public thinking when they made this a big hit?" way.

When people recite songs lyrics to make them sound important, they almost always sound stupid, not poetic.

Is Robert Plant going to let Alison Krauss speak?

RADIOHEADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!

Seriously, Radiohead--or Thom, Jonny, and the USC Marching Band--were killer.

Other best performances: Estelle and Kanye West and Paul McCartney backed by a Foo Fighter while he sang "I Saw Her Standing There" as if it were still fresh,

I could really do without the march of CBS stars introducing performers. ABC doesn't send out the cast of Grey's Anatomy on the Oscars.

They really don't give away many awards on the show, do they? This is more like a multi-act concert interrupted by trophies being handed out.

I see, Robert Plant was just waiting until they won the night's final award to let Alison Krauss get in a few words. I've read that their album is a good one, but once again the Grammys go with the choice of something safe and irrelevant as far as the scene is concerned.